By Deborah Reed
WKTV Managing Editor
Wyoming resident Ryan Gadberry served four years (2013-2017) in the U.S. Marines. While no longer on active-duty, the local veteran continues serving by bringing comfort and recognition to hospice veterans during their end-of-life journey.
Already serving as Property Manager for Hospice of Michigan, Gadberry stepped in to help when he heard Hospice of Michigan needed veteran volunteers.
For the past eight months, Gadberry has used his military experiences to make a meaningful impact.
“I am more than happy to give back,” said Gadberry. “It’s very heartwarming; it makes you feel like you’re doing something really important.”
Camaraderie and compassion
Hospice of Michigan strives to deliver the holistic, loving care veterans deserve. Veteran volunteers make a difference in the lives of others by sitting and visiting with fellow veteran patients.
Gadberry said there is a specific connection between veterans due to shared military training and history.
“You can meet a total stranger and, once you find out they are a fellow service person, there is an immediate connection,” said Gadberry. “You’re no longer a stranger.”
That connection has been frequently proven, but one instance made a lasting impact on Hospice of Michigan Volunteer Program Manager, Lauren Becker-Barkman.
A lifelong Marine within hours of the end of his life journey was restless, repeatedly reaching and calling out.
“There was no peace in this man’s world at this time,” said Becker-Barkman. “He’s uncomfortable, he’s restless.”
The hospice team asked a veteran volunteer to sit with the veteran in hopes of making a difference in his end-of-life journey.
“By the time [the volunteer] left,” said Becker-Barkman, “he was comfortable, he was at peace. He wasn’t calling out, he wasn’t reaching out.”
The veteran passed within a few hours – and what was said during that time together remains unknown.
“We don’t know what was said or what passed between these two veterans, but whatever it was allowed this man to find peace and to be able to go on peacefully,” said Becker-Barkman. “That’s the kind of connection you can’t make up. The impact is immeasurable.”
Gadberry personally cultivates that special connection with hospice veterans through empathy and understanding.
A desire to serve
A first-generation serviceman in his family, Gadberry always knew he wanted to be a Marine.
“Even when I was a kid, that was the plan. Finish high school, join the Marines. That’s what I did.”
Gadberry served as an intelligence analyst, working with several overseas ops – and has no regrets.
“I love that I did it; it definitely turned me into the man I am today.”
And that man gets a visible bounce in his step when meeting fellow veterans.
An unexpected impact
“He gets a little pep in his step knowing that he’s going to meet a veteran,” said Becker-Barkman, adding that Gadberry is also asked to read poems or talk about the impact of veteran connections often. “He’s incredibly humble about being a veteran himself…so to know that he’s also getting some recognition and that he’s continuing to make an impact, it’s really cool.”
Gadberry said that volunteering has impacted him in ways he didn’t expect – especially the pinning ceremonies.
“What surprised me was the impact it has on the families,” said Gadberry. “It’s overwhelming to see. It’s important to make that veteran feel remembered and seen, but they’re on their end-of-life journey, they’re going to be gone soon. But that ceremony, and those memories, are going to be passed on and kept with the family members for many years to come.”
Though many veterans are recognized for their service through their communities, American Legion or VFW, there are just as many who never see recognition of any kind. Gadberry said giving that recognition to veterans during the last steps of their end-of-life journey is memorable for all involved.
“Every ceremony, every event is completely different,” said Gadberry. “Every time I do it, I take away something different and I learn a little bit more.”
Becker-Barkman said her time with Hospice of Michigan has also been life-changing.
“I’ve learned so much about end-of-life care and what that entails for us as human beings,” said Becker-Barkman. “I get to be surrounded by so many brilliant, loving, giving people that it’s changed my entire outlook on everything.
“It’s magical to be surrounded by people who are so willing to show up for people they don’t know at what can be the hardest time in their life; it’s rejuvenating.”
The value of serving in new ways
Hospice of Michigan is continually in need of compassionate veteran volunteers to provide that much needed support and camaraderie to hospice veterans. Regardless of how they served, the bond between veterans opens a door of trust and communication through mutual understanding.
“Veterans share a unique bond,” said Kathy Lietaert, Hospice of Michigan Statewide Volunteer Program Manager, in supplied material. “Through our veterans hospice program, every act of service by volunteer veterans brings comfort, connection and compassion to hospice veterans who need it most at the end of life.”
Becker-Barkman said they are always looking for more volunteer support, in Grand Rapids and throughout the state – and their volunteering schedule is flexible.
“You could [visit] one patient a month, visit once a week, or whatever fits your schedule,” said Becker-Barkman. “We don’t have any rigid guidelines. We want volunteers to be able to fit this into their lives in a way that’s meaningful and not overwhelming for them.”
Volunteer orientations are hosted on an as-needed basis so prospective volunteers can learn in their own time. Training or previous volunteer experience is not needed. All veterans willing to donate their time and companionship to hospice care patients are welcome.
Gadberry believes that veterans will step in to help once they are aware of the need.
“I was more than happy to help out,” said Gadberry. “I think that will be the case for other veterans out there. If they hear that another veteran needs some form of help, they will always step up.”
Learn more!
Prospective volunteers can contact Lauren Becker-Barkman at 616-250-9110 or lbecker-barkman@hom.org.
Learn more about Hospice of Michigan and submit an online volunteer application here.
