By Victoria Mullen
Sure you’ve had it up to “there” with clever wordplay, but sometimes it can’t be helped. It’s been a really rough morning, and from time to time, cliches have a calming effect. Such is the case today.
Aside from that, did you know there’s a hot, new shop on South Division? It’s called boldSOCKS, and that’s not false advertising. If you’re a man, you’ll be in sock heaven. They have women’s socks, too, but the selection isn’t nearly as large or as bold as the men’s. I have already brought this to the establishment’s attention, and they have assured me that they will get right on it.
The creators of this long-overdue niche store say that the idea was sparked by some good-natured competition between the founders about who wore the coolest socks. It didn’t take long before they came to an impasse because there just weren’t any retailers with the cojones to carry a bold line of socks. The rest is a basement-to-Internet to brick-and-mortar story that warms the cockles of any heart. Other local companies also had humble beginnings in a founder’s basement and they grew to be incredibly profitable, so this thing could be HUGE.
Out of the original competition came the realization that men in conservative work environments need a way to express themselves. I mean, if you have to wear a monkey suit day after day after boring day, I guess you could express individuality with a tie, but even that might be too risky in ultra-conservative places like banks and such. Socks? That’s a whole ‘nother story.
Bold socks enable men in any field of employment and at any income level to rock just about any pattern, any color they like. Yessiree, a man can now control how much personality he feels is appropriate to reveal to the Big Cheese. Cross legs for just a peep of personality. For those particularly awful bosses, one need only refrain from crossing legs, and Mr. Mean is none the wiser.
As an aside, how can anyone live that way? I’m not judging; I honestly wanted to know. After pondering the dilemma for some time, it became clear to me that these socks are saving the world, one man at a time. By allowing some freedom of expression, these socks prevent men from going off the deep end. On a collective level, this is a huge feat. These socks deserve recognition for their contribution to the well-being of all of humanity.
On a more local level, men just want to have fun. Trends include mustache socks, airplane socks, penguin socks, and video game controller socks. If you’re not up to speed on the style of the moment, don’t despair; there’s a blog on the website that dishes on the color of the month, pairing ideas, trending patterns and more. Even the geekiest guy can rock a cool style and people will have absolutely no clue that he’s clueless.
The brick-and-mortar shop at 17 S. Division (near Fulton) has 600 square feet designed to mock an art gallery. Maybe “mock” isn’t the right word. How about “mimic?” No. That doesn’t feel right either. Resemble? Stop in the shop and let us know what you think.
So, guys, if you feel like letting some of your personality quirks peep out in a way that is socially acceptable, check out this shop. There are more than 200 styles and colors from which to choose.
Makes a great gift, by the way.
Still waiting on women’s socks.
Yep.
Waiting…
